The unconscious disease - Part II

This post is the second part of http://charles-camarda.blogspot.com/2010/10/unconscious-disease-part-i.html and once again, there is “adult content”, so people under 18 should read no further… and may I have a second lens for Christmas please Santa…

When I arrived my English was like a soft drink in a Scottish pub…nonexistent! Within the first few days of my arrival, I spent a weekend with a group of people. I didn’t know anybody, and when the clock struck noon, and our stomachs yelled “famished !!!” We went to the picnic table to have lunch. I think many people have stomachs that share something in common with Pavlov’s dog. At twelve o’clock, even if you were not hungry before, you suddenly are now. So I was in a middle of a big group of people, and because I am a well brought up young man (in appearance), I wished the girl next to me ‘’bon appetit”. I don’t know if it was my accent or that she didn’t know this phrase, but for one second her eyes became so big she looked like a surprised puffer-fish ! I tried to repeat the phrase with the artificial addition of an English accent, but it came out as ‘’booonnne appetiiite”. I got a double puffer fish look. Hiding in the shadows, like the devil ready to play trick, was another person who was watching us. He completely understood what I wanted to say, and apparently he has a PhD in puffer fish behavior. He looked at me and said “Dig in”. Politely, I repeated what I had heard to this girl, and “dig in” became “dick in”. I am sure she had no comprehension of French manners, but she understood the second sentence very clearly. The “devil” corrected the situation quickly by explaining my mistake… This story has a good ending, because nobody in the group was upset by my suggestion, and soon all became friends.

Photographing wildlife is one of my favorite activities. Just as many famous people are linked to a mythical animal, I also have my own personal obsession... One day I was talking to a friend and I said ‘’ My dream is to take pictures of a Harfeng” (I was in the habit of seeing puffer fish reaction). “A harfeng…? What is a Harfeng…” For once it was easy to explain what I meant and drive away this stupid fish.

- Did you see Arry Potter?

- See what ?

- Arry Potter

- A reporter ?

- Yes yes, Arry Potter’s white bird

- ……………….. a reporter’s whtite bird ? No.

- What ? Amazing you’ve never seen Arry Potter !

This is a perfect example of the “H disease”. And by the way a “harfeng” is a snow-owl and my friend never saw a white bird with a reporter, but did see “Harry Potter”. Of course with this terrible malady, when I said to another person ‘’I want to shoot a snow-owl’’ and it came out like ‘’I wHant to shoot a snow howl”, you could imagine the puffer-fish invasion…

So these are some of my mistakes in this country. I am sure many of my friends have more examples, but there are nice to me and say nothing, or perhaps they know, I don’t take pictures, I shoot……